Chapter Seven

The new day dawned bright and sunny as if to mock Lamorna’s grief. She dragged herself from her bed. Most of her hair had worked free of her braid and she absently pushed it off her face. She could barely keep her sore, red-rimmed eyes open. Tugging half-heartedly at her rumpled clothes, she made no real effort to neaten herself.

Stepping from her room, she found her nightmare had yet to end. Logan had fallen asleep at the table and was still there. Soft singing came from her parents’ room. Black-robed women, their heads covered, sat like wraiths around the waxen figure on the bed with her hair arranged so neatly, so beautifully around her. Lamorna stood at the doorway, staring at her mother’s still body until she could no longer bear the sight.

Turning away, she saw Lulie enter with the hated creature in her arms. She wanted to run to the sanctuary of her room, but the ample woman unknowingly blocked her way.

“Did you manage to sleep, child?” Lulie’s gentle tone only made Lamorna want her mother more.

Clenching her jaw, Lamorna nodded, refusing to look at the infant.

“It is not my wish to burden you so soon, but you need to learn how to care for the baba, to help your father–”

“I won’t be here.”

Clearly surprised, Lulie stared. “Whatever do you mean?”

“Soon, I will be wedded to Daroth and I will have to go–”

“Oh, Lamorna. I’m sure all those plans will be changed, now that, now that...” She shook her head as tears glistened in her eyes.

“But that’s what Papa said would happen.”

Blinking rapidly, Lulie glanced at Logan, but he remained asleep. “Well, I don’t think it will happen anytime soon, your father will need you here. Now come, I’ll show you what to do. Don’t worry if you cannot remember, you know that you can call on me or any of the other women for help.” She shepherded Lamorna into the girl’s room, and lay the baby on the bed as she explained, what she believed to be, the important aspects of caring for a new-born.

“As for feeding, goat’s milk is proving adequate.” She dipped her voice to a whisper. “Vanora will make the milk suitable for him to drink. But do not mention that to anyone.”

Lamorna sighed. “All this secrecy–” She flinched as Lulie grasped her arm.

“You mustn’t discuss Vanora and what she does.  We cannot afford to lose her.”

“She did nothing for my mam.”

“She did all she could, which is more than anyone else here could have done. If not for her, this little one also would have died.”

“Then I wish he had died instead of Mam.”

“Lamorna!”

“Hush, Lulie,” said a soft voice from the doorway. “It is the grief that speaks.”

They turned to see Vanora, clad in a grey gown and cloak, her hair neatly braided. She did not seem to belong amongst so much unkempt grief. Only her slack expression and dull eyes spoke of her sorrow. “I will see to Lamorna and the little one now. And I am ever grateful for all your help.”

“I wish I could have done more, Mistress. Reena was a good woman, a good friend.” She wiped her tears, cuddled the baby close before relinquishing him to Vanora. After a moment’s hesitation, she gave Lamorna a quick hug, who stood as if made of stone.

Vanora was the first to break the suffocating silence. “I am truly sorry for your loss, child.”

Lamorna remained silent, her gaze fixed to the floor.

“I know it feels as if the loss is too much to endure–”

“You know?” she said though clenched teeth.

“I have lost both my parents,” was Vanora’s soft reply. “It is natural to be angry, it is to be expected.”

Lamorna angled her body away from the woman.

“But whatever you are feeling, still this little one needs to be cared for. Remember your promise to your mother?”

She wanted to scream her anger, unable to believe how glad she’d felt, knowing Vanora would be helping her mother. But she could not ignore the promise she’d made to the dying Reena. Forcing her arms up, she reached for her brother.

“You remember all that Lulie told you?”

Holding the infant as if he were something repulsive, she nodded, her movements jerky.

“You know where I am if you need me. Lulie will help you with the milk and the feeding.” She hesitated as if she had more to say; instead, she turned and left as silently as she’d appeared.

Lamorna remained staring through the open doorway. Logan was no longer at the table; she absently wondered where he was. The child squirmed slightly; she automatically looked down. And started when she found herself being regarded by a pair of midnight-dark eyes, tinged with blue. “Oh. You’re awake. I’m supposed to look after you even though you killed my mam. And I will, not because you’re my brother but because I promised Mam I would.”

Raised voices piqued her curiosity and she ventured out of her room. She paused long enough to see that her mother now lay alone; she wondered where the women were for she had not heard them leave. Crossing the main room, she stood at the threshold of her home.

It seemed as if the entire village was gathered outside along with the mourning women and Logan. Her eyes widened as she took in his appearance. With his hair standing on end, his wide, staring eyes and dishevelled clothes, he looked nothing like her beloved father. Pacing back and forth, he kept gesturing wildly.

“Logan, listen to reason.” Morien, their leader, grabbed Logan by the arms. “You know they won’t allow you to lay Reena to rest in the grounds of worship.”

Lamorna gasped as her father fought free of Morien’s hold.

“They will listen to me! I’ll make them. They can’t deny me the right to bury my wife where I choose.”

“But they can,” said Aherin. “It’s what they do. Don’t provoke them, please.”

With an animal-like cry, he pushed away and stood, hands spread before him as if begging for aid. Without warning, he turned and ran towards the castle and temple on the high ground.

Morien cursed and ran after him, closely followed by Aherin. Murmurs rippled through the crowd but, as more and more noticed Lamorna, they fell silent and gradually melted away. Janina and Ella lingered until their mothers, part of the group of mourning women, gestured at them; they too drifted away.

The twins materialised by her side. Maldon put his arms around her waist.

“He’s a good baby,” said Marden, peering at the still-awake infant. “I heard Mama say last night.”

“Lamorna, child, come home with the boys and me,” said Lulie.

She shook her head. “I can’t leave Mam alone. I won’t.” Her gaze was fixed to where she’d lost sight of Logan; why had he run off like that, leaving them? “What was Papa arguing about?” She turned to Lulie who had to look away. “The priests will let us bury... lay Mam to rest, won’t they? We’ve never missed a day of worship... Why did Elder Morien say Mam won’t be allowed–”

“Your father is very upset; he doesn’t know what he’s saying. Now come, we’ll stay here with you for now. Boys, fetch the goat. Lamorna will have need of it here. And then milk it without making a mess or upsetting the poor beast,” she said as she ushered Lamorna inside.